Oral Guide for Him

Hi, there. My name is Alice. Today we’re going to practice giving oral sex to a partner. This episode is going to focus on penis-owners and how to use the mouth to bring your partner pleasure.

Oral sex is one of those things that feels different to everyone. Some people love it, some people are ambivalent about it. It can be a great foreplay exercise for some and the main event for others. The important thing to know is that everyone’s vulva is different and everyone is going to experience oral sex a little differently.

Today we’re going to just be focusing on oral, but before we get started, consider if you want to include any other stimulation during this exercise. Like I mentioned before, some people find oral enough on its own, but others might need that extra little something to make it really enjoyable. For example, either of you might want to include a vibrator, or maybe wear a buttplug, or possibly nipple clamps.

If you’re going to be receiving during this exercise, be ready to give your partner some constructive feedback. Tell them when you really like what you’re doing. And gently guide or adjust them when you want them to try something else. If you’re going to be giving today, try not overthink what you’re doing.

You know your partner. Follow their body language, their emotional signs, and any verbal feedback they give you. Being able to sense and understand your partner’s comfort level is a great skill when it comes to sex.

Alright, let’s go ahead and get comfortable. Make sure you and your partner are somewhere private where you can spend some uninterrupted time together. If you’d like, you can lie down on the bed together or perhaps stretch out on the floor. Anywhere that you’ll be comfortable and able to move around a bit.

Now, before we get started, let’s do a little breathing exercise to get our minds clear and our bodies calm. Take a deep breath in. And out. That’s great. Let’s do one more. In...and out.

Very good.

Alright. We’re going to start with some gentle and slow foreplay. Whatever that might mean for both of you. Kissing, embracing, dragging your fingers gently down each other’s bodies. Just relax into each other’s touch and start to get warmed up.

If you haven’t decided yet who will be giving and who will be receiving today, you can discuss that right now.

Keep going. Make each other feel good. However that looks and feels for both of you…

Very good. You’re doing great.

We’re going to move on now. But if you need to, you can pause this episode and spend as much time as you’d like warming each other up. Sound good? Okay. If you’re going to be giving oral today, I want you to gently start making your way down your partner’s body. Using your lips, draw a line from their mouth all the way down to their hips.

Kiss their neck, their shoulders, their chest, their stomach. Go slow. Maybe add in little touches here and there.

That’s great.

As you slowly get into position, make sure that both of you are comfortable. If you’re receiving, maybe get a pillow for your neck. And if you’re giving, consider a pillow for your knees.

Don’t worry, we’re going to try out some different positions in a little bit. There are multiple configurations you try for giving oral, but for now, let’s just start simple with one person sitting or lying comfortably somewhere and the other kneeling between their legs.

Perfect.

Feel free to begin giving your partner oral as I talk. I’m going to be giving you some tips and things to try as you go.

Although oral is focused on the genitals, make sure not to neglect the rest of your partner’s body. Giving them multiple points of stimulation is going to amplify their pleasure throughout this experience. As you get settled between their legs, try dragging your fingers down their thighs. If they like a slightly harder touch, you can try kneading or massaging them.

Start with slow and shallow strokes with your mouth up and down your partner’s penis. As you take the shaft further and further into your mouth, stay aware of your gag reflex and if it’s getting triggered. Most of the penis sensation is located in and around the tip, so it isn’t necessary to deep throat your partner unless that’s something you feel comfortable and able to do.

Now, I want you to take your hand and wrap your index finger and thumb around the base of your partner’s penis. Any time that you move your lips up or down the shaft, make sure that these two fingers follow. This will give your partner multiple sensations to focus on.

When you feel comfortable, start taking their penis further and further into your mouth.

You’re both just getting warmed up now. Just waking up to the sensation of pleasure. As you continue to slide your mouth up and down your partner’s shaft, experiment with the pressure you’re applying. You can try curling your lips over your teeth to add a little more pressure. Or allow your tongue to be loose and soft to try and cover as much surface area as possible.

Don’t be afraid to get a little sloppy and wet - that can make things easier and it’s also often a turn on for the receiver.

Let’s take some time now to focus on certain parts of the penis, starting with the tip. The tip is a very sensitive area and can be easily stimulated with soft licks. Try rotating your tongue in a slow circle all around the tip.

To make things a little more intense, look into your partner’s eyes as you do this. Eye contact can sometimes amplify feelings of pleasure and desire during oral sex.

Very good. Now, slide your tongue onto the underside of the penis. The frenulum is located here, which is another very-sensitive body part. It’s a small bit of tissue that connects the head of the penis to the shaft. You can give your partner very intense pleasure by focusing your attention here.

If you’re receiving oral right now, make sure to communicate with your partner what you’re enjoying and what you want more of. If it suits your dynamic in the bedroom, feel free to talk dirty to them, pet their hair, tell them they are doing well.

As you continue to stroke the shaft with your mouth, start using your free hand to add in extra stimulation. Your partner might enjoy having their testicles squeezed and massaged while receiving oral. Take the ballsack gently into your hand and slowly, softly squeeze.

You can also use one of your fingers to stimulate the perineum. This is a small stretch of skin between the anus and the testicles. Like the frenulum, touching or stimulating it will give your partner even more pleasure.

You’re doing great. Remember, there’s no end goal here. We’re just experimenting with pleasure together.

Now, let’s try switching positions. Switching things up mid-way during oral can keep the act fresh and novel. If you’re currently giving oral, take a moment to pause. I want you to switch positions with your partner. Lie down on your bed, or couch so that your back is leaning against the headboard or the wall, or the arm of the couch.

Have your partner straddle your upper body so that their penis is just in front of your face. They might need to lean against the wall or hold onto something for leverage. You can hold onto one of their hips with one hand while you stroke their shaft with the other. Or, you can use that free hand to please yourself. Take a few moments to try out this new position and get situated.

That’s great. You’re doing so well.

Another way to increase your partner’s pleasure is to engage in a little bit of anal play while you’re giving a blowjob. Take a few moments to discuss with your partner if light anal stimulation with one finger is something you’re both comfortable with.

Okay, so if you want to try a little anal stimulation, get ready to enter your partner by lubricating your finger with saliva or lube. If you don’t want to try this extra bit of stimulation, no worries. Just ignore this next bit of instruction and keep on doing what you’re doing. When you find your partner’s entrance, gently rub around it with your index finger. You can try tapping it and applying various amounts of pressure while you continue to give them oral.

When you and your partner are ready, gently insert your finger into your partner’s anus. Just give them some slow, shallow thrusts. Remember, this is just to supplement the please you’re giving them with your mouth.

Great job.

I’m going to give you some time now to keep going and practice these different techniques. Feel free now to combine various speeds and pressures with your tongue and your hands.

Remember, communication is a key aspect to understanding both your and your partner’s pleasure. Give feedback. Ask questions. And experiment.

I hope you continue to explore and give each other pleasure.

Thanks for listening.