Hard to Forget

I really wish I had a cigarette.

And I wish all these people would get out of my apartment.

I have no idea why I agreed to this ‘welcome home’ party. And why the hell did I agree to let Malik host it at my place?

Ugh, whatever. It’s not my friends I’m mad at… It’s this whole situation.

God, I never thought in a million years I’d be moving back here. But Dad’s getting older and needs help running his store. I’m happy to be here for him, but… there’s a lot I left behind in this little town when I left.

You being one of them.

It’s been three years since we’ve seen each other, let alone talked. God, you still look just like you did in college. It was so hard to act normal when you first got here, like we were just old friends or something. We were so much more than that.

You still walk around with that little half-smile on your face, like you’ve got a secret you’re hiding from everyone. Your beard is a little longer than I’m used to seeing it, but those scruffy cheeks still make me want to rub my face against yours. And you still look at me from across the room even when we’re talking to other people.

Oh, shit.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

“Not interrupting anything, am I?”

“Oh, uh, no… it was… just kinda hot in there. Needed some fresh air.”

“Must be crazy being back here after so long.”

“Yeah, yeah, definitely. Lots of… lots of memories here. It’s nice.”

You move to stand next to me and I get a whiff of your cologne. God, you even smell the same.

“It’s nice for me too. Seeing you.”

“Yeah.”

You dip your head to the side and look up at me with soft, narrowed eyes. My face is starting to feel hot under your gaze.

The thought of you kissing me flashes in my mind. No, no. Just… don’t go there.

I’ve always had a hard time expressing myself, but you do it with such ease. It’s like you can just say what’s on your mind without obsessing over finding the right words.

As far as breakups go, ours was pretty amicable. College had just ended and I got offered an incredible job in London.

You were born and raised here, just like me, but you had no plans on leaving. There was no bad blood or anything between us. We just sort of agreed that long-distance wasn’t going to work out.

But I’ve definitely wondered what it would be like… if we hadn’t…

I’ve stopped myself from calling you so many times, just because I knew how hard it would be knowing we can’t be together.

And I’ve definitely jerked off thinking about you.

I can’t think of anything to say. I feel, like, frozen in this moment. Like there’s this tangible thing between us. Like no time has passed at all.

“I missed you.”

“I missed you.”

You rest your arm on the railing and it brushes against mine. A bolt of white hot desire runs through me. I’d forgotten… just how good it feels to be around you.

God, how do you do this? We’ve barely even talked tonight and I feel like I’m losing my—

I pull back for just a second and your eyes ask if I want you to stop.

I orient my body towards yours and you walk me backwards into the cool stucco wall. We’re just past the sliding glass door, just out of sight from anyone who might be looking out from inside.

“Fuck… I’m not going to be able to stop if we start…”

Your tongue pushes into my mouth and you suck hard on my bottom lip.

“Good.”

You lay your hand against the wall next to my head and press your hips into mine. Oh my god, I’ve missed this. I’ve missed your body. Your kiss.

Our bodies fit so well together. Everything about this is so natural, so easy.

I reach up to bury my fingers in your messy hair and a flash of memories suddenly hits me. All of the times we fucked in your tiny apartment off 3rd street. The time you fucked me on the street outside of the club.

I grab at your shirt collar and pull you closer.

“Mmm, fuck. You feel good.”

You push your knee between my legs and rub up against my cock.

There’s so many people inside, just a few feet away. There’s no way we could do this and not get caught…

We grind against each other, our cocks rubbing through our pants as our bodies melt together.

“Can you stay quiet?”

“Yeah, yeah…”

Your hand dips down into my briefs and curls around my cock.

I bite down on my lip and tilt my head back against the wall.

“Ohhh, fuck, I missed this…”

“Me too…”

You massage my shaft with a firm grip and your thumb drifts over my swollen head. Your lips press against my neck and push my head to the side so you can kiss me just above my collarbone.

I keep my hands on your hips, squeezing tighter as you spread precum all over my dick.

My body goes almost limp as I surrender to your touch.

“Stay quiet, stay quiet.”

You cover my mouth with a deep kiss.

“I wish I could fuck you right now. You have no idea how bad I want you…”

I consider for a moment going inside and telling everyone to leave. No, no, I can’t do that. Fuck, we’ll just have to wait.

“Soon… soon, when everyone… when everyone’s gone…”

You drag your thumb around the head of my cock before pumping it harder in your warm palm.

“I can’t believe you’re here…”

“I know… I’ve been thinking about you… a lot.”

Anyone could see us if they decide to come out for a smoke or something. Oh my god, doing it out in the open like this… fuck…

“Yeah?”

I squeeze the back of your neck with my free hand and bury my face into your neck.

“Yeah…”

My hands are shaking a little, moving quickly. Like we’ve got to make up for all of the time we lost. I slide my hand down your pants and grab your cock, stroking it with the inside of my palm.

We writhe against each other with my back pressed against the wall. My hips rock against your hand as you jerk me.

“Ohh, fuck… God, I want you.”

“Be patient.”

“You know how hard that is for me…”

“F-faster… faster… yeah, yeah, just like that… ”

I squeeze my eyes shut and try to focus on the feeling of your stubble scratching against my neck. It’s hard to focus. I can barely see straight, it feels so good.

“Shhh, they’ll hear.”

“Okay, okay, just don’t stop.”

Your cock is hot and hard in my hand. You press all of your weight up against me.

“Yeah, like that, yeah, yeah…”

I twist my hand around your hard cock, squeezing around the head as I stroke. It feels good that I still know exactly what you like.

Your hand stills, your mouth hanging open. I love the face you make when you’re close.

“Come on, faster… don’t stop…”

“Still so impatient…”

“Ohhhh, fuck…”

Your hand slides so easily over my cock. Our hands graze against each other as we both stroke harder and faster…

Your whole body is taut and tense… Ohhh, fuck…

“You close, baby?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m close…”

“Gonna fucking cum for me? Do it, come on.”

“That’s it.”

Shit… your hips buck into me as you work through the aftershocks.

“Mmmm…”

“Should probably head back inside…”

“Yeah…”

“Yeah. Um… I wanna… do this again sometime. And—and hang out. And… catch up. All that stuff, you know.”

“Yeah. I do, too. Maybe when there’s less people around.”

“Right, right. Yeah. Maybe we can start with… coffee.”

“It’s a date.”